Sunday, August 16, 2009

Republican Medicare Recipients Don't Support Gov't Health Care

Death Panels...coming to a Town Hall meeting near you.

Study finds surprising results

A new study, released yesterday by the Associated Press, has found out that "old (65 and older), white, Republicans with a High School education or lower" don't support Barack Obama's current push for Government Health Insurance. The study also found that the level of racism involved in this opposition is 100x higher than in the general population, as are feelings of "fear, anger and hostility" and a general disdain for "accurate and factual representations of the issue(s)."

Old Man
I don't want NO Gov'ment in MY Medicade

Also, people within this same demographic, "old, white, republican with a high school education or lower," were 15x more likely to believe disproven assertions, including "Barack Obama is not a U.S. citizen," "The Government will insate Death Panels to kill your grandmother" and "Suddam Hussein hired illegal immigrants to provide abortions for non-abstinent athiest teens and ALSO built WMD (and nuclear weapons) for Al Quaeda Death-Panels during 9/11, ALL while forging Barack Obama's birth cirtificate...and oh, God Bless 'Merica!"

Fear tactics taken to their logical conclusion

ALSO...if Obama's Health Care proposals are passed...THIS will happen:

"Medicare: Good...but Government Health Insurance: Baaad" Wait...WTF!?

Most shocking, however, are the results of a government questionaire, also released yesterday, that shows that 60% of people on Medicare don't know that fact that "Medicare is provided by the government." --- Wait, did I just hear that right? You CAN'T be CANNOT seriously say to me "I'm on Medicare and I want to keep my Medicare...but 'Government Insurance' will kill me." Do these people SERIOUSLY not realize that Medicare IS GOVERNMENT HEALTH INSURANCE?! Do I SERIOUSLY have to debunk such a ridiculous myth? How is that even a "myth"? That's like debunking the "flat Earth" and the "sky is not blue" and the "dry ocean" myths!


Seriously. Seriously? SERIOUSLY! Are you telling me that the same people who think like this are allowed on our roadways? How do they know that "red" means stop and "green" means go if they don't understand that Medicare is Government Health Insurance? How do they know that "feed a bear by hand" is dangerous and "pet a cute bunny rabbit" is good? That "hot" means don't touch and "cool" means do touch? You use "soap and water" to wash your hands and not "feces and urine"? That "clear water" is to drink and "brown-reddish water" is not to drink? This all begs the question: How are these people still alive? Why hasn't their stupidity killed them yet?


~Static~ said...


I believe the sole reason these "lucky" individuals haven't met their maker through their own stupidity, or been a recipient of the Darwin Award YET, is due to the fact they have been hiding underground/under rocks. They chose this moment to come out of the woodwork and congregate much like flies on shit.

Of course they don't recognize their own stupidity, so it should only be a matter of time before they shoot themselves in the foot, bleed to death for want of a govt free health care system, and go to their great big farm/donkey plow/100 virgins w/guns - heaven in the sky.

So long suckers! said...

Good Good

Jesus the hobo said...

Î wtf?

anyway...i dont even qualify for medicare since i m homeless, but i can crawl/roll into the local free clinic to get treated for my syphilis!!

Static said...

One cannot forget to address that Medicare kind suck. Especially where medications and a network of quality physicians are concerned.

Perhaps Obama and Congress would be willing to flip the bill until this much anticipated reform takes place?

Tricia said...

Anither great post, very funny. I love the motivational posters you created. Very witty as always. :)

Julio said...

Tricia...WILL YOU HAVE MY BABIES?! What issue would you like my next post to be about? Since you've commented consistently on my posts and thereby risen my self-esteem from that of a chamber-pot HOLDER to that of a chamber-pot CLEANER, I will grant your secret wish HENCEFORTH!

Julio said...

Medicaid sucks because IT'S FREE! Free things suck. Remember "free" land-line internet (where you would get kicked off everytime someone called)? Free McDonald's lattes (it's Mcdonald's lattes...eww)? Free SEX (she WASN'T a me)!? A singler payer system, however, would include HEALTHY people, not just sick people. An insurance made entirelly of sick old people is doomed to failure because the insurance will pay out EXPONENTIALLY more than it receives. At least a single payer gov't plan, though it will still fail to make a profit, won't have the disparities seen in Medicaid (since, ya know, you WILL have to pay to have the gov't plan. It won't be free, which is a big part in how we will pay for it).

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