Thursday, April 9, 2009

After a Lengthy Hiatus, Hitler's Famous Mustache is Socially Acceptable (and cool)!

Liberal Fascism Pictures, Images and Photos

Let me just start off by informing you that I may/do suffer from a condition which prevents me from comprehending "human" emotion. That being said, I can now admit that I am not certain whether or not "the Holocaust" was necessarily a "bad" thing...but then again, the fact that there is only one "the Holocaust," much like there is only one "NAMBLA" and one true "God" (i.e. Zeus), indicates that it was nonetheless significant. For whatever reason, the mastermind of the Holocuast...was not Jesus executing his revenge on the Jews for his untimely death, though it would make an awesome animated film made by Disney/Pixar titled "Horton Hears a Jew: The Diary of Anne Frank II". 

No, no...instead, the "accepted" mastermind of the Holocuast,  Adolf Smallpenis Hitler, was guilty of the alleged genocide of 10 million-or-so "people," and in doing so completely tarnished the reputation of the infamous mustache. After the end of WWII, any and all who would dare replicate his signature "thick, only on the middle-upper-lip mustache" were thereon considered social outcasts and otherwise dispicable human beings...

...that is, until recently. Below is a chart detailing the evolution of the Hitler mustache from eclectic fashion to brutal dictator to A-list celebrity. 

Top Row: American Nazi Politicians; Middle: Known Historical Nazis; Bottom: Celebrety Nazis

As we can clearly see, the Hitler Mustache was harmless fashion, first made famous by Jesus Christ, and then again by comedian Charlie Chaplin. Then came Hitler, who chose this particular mustache for reasons that we can only assume involved God's twisted plan to have revenge on the Jews for killing Jesus. Slowly but surely, the mustache made its return to political life, especially in America, where it is speculated that the inherent evil of the mustache corrupted all who dared to wear it. About two years ago, however, celebrities in Hollywood, CA began sporting the facist facial hair to award ceremonies and prominent charity events. The image of the Hitler Mustache soon changed from that of a Tyrranical Toothbrush to a Charitable Chaplin. Today, prominent wearers include celebrity couple "Bradgelina" and that weird guy who played "Kramer" on Seinfeld who's also a racist.

Anyway, if any of you guys inside the series of tubes known as the "Internets" know of any other celebrities who are sporting the "Hitler Mustache" just drop the info inside the comment line and share it with the world (i.e. the 12 people per month who stumble across this website!~)

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