Friday, May 1, 2009

The Para"OMFG"Olympics

Okay, lets just say your wife's best friend is a paraplegic (i.e. cripple). One day, your wife's friend invites you both to view the Paralympics, with the main event being the 5K women's wheel-chair race. Everything is going're even enjoying yourself and getting into the race. Then THIS happens:

Do you say:
a) Shriek in horror "Oh My Fucking God (OMFG)! I hope they have wheel-chair insurance!"
b) "OMFG, as if being a cripple wasn't bad enough!"
c) "It's okay everyone...God obviously just hates some people more than others..."
d) Laugh histerically until you're kicked out of the house by your wife's angry wheel-chair ridden best friend.
e) "Sliiiiiiide-show"

If you chose "D"...then you're a fucking moron. However, being that I am a fucking moron, I had no other choice BUT to choose "D". Before you judge me, though, please hear me out. I hate crippled people...if, that is, you consider them to be "people" in the first place! The only thing they're good for are side-show slide-shows.

...Of course, I don't really feel that way, but would not such a view be considered "extreme"? Extremely offensive, angry, illogical and hateful? I mean, what the hell kind of person hates and makes fun of people who overcome a handicapp? 


Oh, right...soooo maybe it was a bit Hitler-ish to laugh at a 5-wheel-chair pile-up. Speaking of which, Hitler was known to be quite the humorist. In the new non-fiction "The Last Witness," Hitler's personal telephonist recalls his disturbing jokes about concentration camp victims, some of whom, we can imagine, were probably crippled. That being said, I think the spirit of Hitler is well alive in the following paralympic joke:

I noes can getz up! I noes haz legz...=(

Now, Before you judge me, though, please hear me out. You must first realize that it was not I, Julio, who made this image, but rather ~Static~ of I did not do anything wrong; I only did what I was told...hmm, now where did I hear that argument before?


Oh, right...

1 comment:

~Static~ said...

You have some strange fascination and/or preoccupation with cripples.. and Hitler, don't you Julio?

in response to your Robot Chicken comment

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